Venus vs. Mars

John Gray has it right. Men really ARE from Mars. Too blunt. Too in your face when it comes to emotions and understanding. We women are so good at understanding and encouraging. I'm well aware of my faults. Who knows better than oneself? You see your reflection in the mirror every single day. You know what you've done and what you need to do. I admit that I'm not my own cheerleader. Far from it. My self-esteem is low. I think I'm really good at beating myself up. I don't need anymore beating. KWIM? It would mean so much to have that unconditional love. Just accept me for me. Love me no matter what. I know. I know. I wear my heart on my sleeve. I'm too damn sensitive. I'm too romantic and I yearn for the same. So when D. tells me I need to lose weight....it hurts. It just does. I can look in the mirror and see myself. I see how I look. I know what I need to do. I think it's the romantic in me....that believes he should love me no matter what. His comments add fuel to my low self-esteem fire. Do I feel pretty? No. Do I feel sexy? No. Do I want him to sweep me off my feet carrying me off to bed for a romantic tryst? No. How could I ever let my guard down when he obviously sees me as fat? I don't know how to do that. I really feel hurt. Yes. I'm flawed. I'm a human. I'm not perfect. I always say I'm a work in progress. There are so many things happening that are stressful. I'm struggling with life things and trying to keep it together. The last thing I want from my husband is criticism. I want love. I want to be loved for who I am...flaws and all. I want to be me and be loved anyway. Why can't "martians" get that? (sigh)